This episode really made me think about how much we’re all trying to figure things out in real time—our bodies, our identities, even our relationships. And what struck me is that in every one of these conversations, there’s this same underlying question: Who—or what—do you trust?
We covered three completely different topics, but they all come back to that.
We started with something I know so many women are dealing with and not always talking about openly: perimenopause. I sat down with Kim, the founder of Coco Loco Body Care, and what I appreciated right away was how personal her approach was. She didn’t create products because it sounded like a good business idea. She created them because her body changed, her skin changed, and she couldn’t find anything that felt both clean and effective.
That’s a very real frustration. You hit a certain age, and suddenly what used to work just… doesn’t. Your skin feels different. Your body feels different. And the market is full of products promising everything, but a lot of it feels like noise.
What I liked about Kim’s perspective is that she was focused on ingredients, on how things actually feel, and on creating something that fits into your life without being overcomplicated or overpriced. There’s also something refreshing about seeing a woman build something in midlife that’s both practical and joyful. That came through in the conversation. It wasn’t just about fixing problems—it was about enjoying where you are now.
From there, we shifted into a completely different conversation, but one that was just as much about understanding yourself.
I spoke with Jennifer Marie, a gender identity coach, and what stayed with me most was how she described her experience. She didn’t say she suddenly decided to become someone else. She said, very clearly, “I always was.”
That distinction matters. It reframes everything.
We talked about the difference between gender identity and gender expression, which a lot of people still confuse. Gender identity is who you are internally. Gender expression is how you present that to the world. And for Jennifer, it took years to connect those dots and to stop ignoring what had been there all along.
What I found especially powerful is how she now helps other people navigate that same process. Not from theory, but from lived experience. And she’s very honest about how complicated it can be—especially when relationships are involved. When you start living more truthfully, things either come together or they come apart. But either way, you’re no longer stuck in that in-between place, and that, in itself, is a kind of relief.
Then we got into something much lighter on the surface—but honestly, just as revealing about where we are right now.
In Spill It, Veida Horn and I answered a question about using ChatGPT for dating advice. And yes, people are actually doing this. They’re uploading text messages, asking what something “means,” even having AI suggest what to say next.
Part of me understands the appeal. Dating can feel confusing, and if something promises clarity, of course people are going to try it.
And to be fair, AI can pick up on patterns. If you give it enough information, it can offer a perspective that sounds logical, even insightful. We tested it live, and the answer it gave wasn’t wildly off.
But here’s the problem: relationships don’t exist in clean patterns. They exist in tone, timing, energy, history—all the things that don’t show up in a text box.
At one point, we joked about people letting AI write their responses, and honestly, you can tell. It’s too perfect. Too polished. It doesn’t sound like a real person. And that’s where it starts to feel disconnected from what dating actually is, which is messy and human and sometimes unclear.
Where we landed was pretty simple. You can use it if you want a second opinion. But it should never replace your own instincts.
Because if your gut is telling you one thing and a robot is telling you another, you already know which one matters more.
That’s really the thread that ties this whole episode together.
Whether it’s your body changing, your identity coming into focus, or your relationships feeling uncertain, there’s always going to be noise. There will always be products, opinions, advice, and now even algorithms trying to tell you what to do.
But at some point, you still have to come back to yourself.
That’s where the real clarity is.
If this episode resonated with you, share it with someone who might need it—and as always, don’t forget to subscribe, leave a review, and follow along.
